A Beautiful Life (story)

I am here, alone. Driving my old motorcycle, go along my town street. My meeting with Darren, my high school’s friend two hours a go was still left on my mind. He asked me why I didn’t come to his party last Saturday night. And I do not have the answer. I wanted to say that he had not invited me, but I cancelled, and just keep the answer on my mind. That fact will hurt me more than to him.

She is not the first friend of mine, who’s no longer involved me in their life. Situation changed. Yea... I know. We are no longer in high school anymore. So, situa-tion got changed. Although actually, I never thought that my world would turn up side down like this after my high school graduation. Back at that time, I always imagined that friendship would last forever. We will be friends forever, just like our promises.

However, situation got changed. My friends, now, are old enough to get driv-ing licenses. And as soon as they get it, their parents give them a new car. The newest car that even its advertisement has not yet released. At first, it was fun. They let me join them to test their car, and of course, their driving skill. That was great experience for me, remembering that my parents can only inherit me old motorcycle. But this fun just like mist in the morning. Soon, as fast as they learn to drive smoothly, they start to ride without my presence.

Fashion also leads our friendship to different ways. With my baggy trousers, old t-shirt, and don’t forget my big thick eyeglasses, I looked like an alien when I hang out with my old high school friends. They wore leather pants and cool t-shirt with low-nicotine cigarette between their lips. So fashionable. So expensive. So far from my financial ability. Hahaha. In high school, where everyone had to wear uni-forms, these differences were not very clearly appeared. I had the same self-confidence as every friend I had. Not like now, when I have to hide on my friend’s back every time we walk on the mall or any public places. I don’t want to embarrass my self, if you want to know why.

The most upsetting point happened when I had to face the fact that my parents can’t afford for my higher education. As blue-collar worker, my father expected me to find a job as soon as possible, to help him support our family financial problems. So, there I am, sitting at the back of the cashier table of Guard, mini market nearby my neighbourhood. This job, though helps me cover my little sister’s school fee, was so pathetic. Sitting from 10 a.m. to 04 p.m. every day really gave me pain in my ass! Really! So, while my friends started to go to their university to reach every dream they have, I was stuck at this point! When they read literature works, I spent most of my time reading expiration date on the label can.

I did not blame my faith. No! I faced this situation as cool as every 19 years old teenagers could. I did my job well. I gave my attention to every customer coming, including sweet smile for extra. I read in public library to sharpen my brain. I also took care of my “ancestor”; I used to call my motorcycle like that, although this “ancestor” sometimes forced me to pull it a long the road. Especially, I never blamed my parents for every thing that happens to me. They love me as much as every parent can do. It was not their fault that I couldn’t go to the university or that I only had motorcycle to ride. They supported me with love and laughter. And every time I felt disappointed with my friends, they were always there for me, giving diversion for my broken heart. It is a beautiful life.

Though, if this is a beautiful life, why I am here? Sitting on my old motorcy-cle, smoking cheap cigarette, doing nothing on the rail waiting for the train. If this is a beautiful life, why am I not moving from my spot as the train is getting closer and closer? If this is a beautiful life, why are tears rolling down my cheek when I heard the train thundering straight to my spot? Why don’t I fell any regret when the train runs over my body? Why there is no peace that I expect when I heard my bones bro-ken into pieces? Why? Because this is a beautiful li...


End.