我很想愛他 - JJ Lin

我很想愛他 - JJ Lin

Lyric plus pinyin:

天空 下起雨了 Tiānkōng xià qǐ yǔ le

他撐的傘 tā chēng de sǎn

在你的身邊陪著 zài nǐ de shēnbiān péi zhe

可是 我不快樂 kěshì wǒ bù kuàilè

因為看見 yīnwèi kànjiàn

他臉上的笑 tā liǎn shàng de xiào

是很勉強的 shì hěn miǎnqiáng de

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是眼睛在說謊 dànshì yǎnjīng zài shuōhuǎng

隱瞞比較容易吧 yǐnmán bǐjiào róngyì ba

免得感情變的複雜 miǎnde gǎnqíng biàn de fùzá

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是理智在吵架 dànshì lǐzhì zài chǎojià

退出可能解圍嗎 tuìchū kěnéng jiěwéi ma

誰能給我一個好的回答 sheí néng gěi wǒ yīgè hǎo de huídá

如果 再捨不得 rúguǒ zài shěbude

這樣下去 zhèyàng xiàqù

我們每個人都是受害者 wǒmen měi gèrén dōu shì shòuhài zhě

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是眼睛在說謊 dànshì yǎnjīng zài shuōhuǎng

隱瞞比較容易吧 yǐnmán bǐjiào róngyì ba

免得感情變的複雜 miǎnde gǎnqíng biàn de fùzá

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是理智在吵架 dànshì lǐzhì zài chǎojià

退出可能解圍嗎 tuìchū kěnéng jiěwéi ma

誰能給我一個好的回答 shuí néng gěi wǒ yīgè hǎo de huídá

當愛情 dāng àiqíng

陷在危險邊緣 xiàn zài wéixiǎn biānyuán

是否都會傷痕累累shìfǒu dūhuì shānghén lěilěi

是否都會苦不堪言 shìfǒu dūhuì kǔ bùkān yán

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是眼睛在說謊 dànshì yǎnjīng zài shuōhuǎng

隱瞞比較容易吧 yǐnmán bǐjiào róngyì ba

免得感情變的複雜 miǎnde gǎnqíng biàn de fùzá

我很想愛他 wǒ hěn xiǎng ài tā

但是理智在吵架 dànshì lǐzhì zài chǎojià

退出可能解圍嗎 tuìchū kěnéng jiěwéi ma

誰能給我一個好的回答 shuí néng gěi wǒ yīgè hǎo de huídá

愛情教會我們都放不下 àiqíng jiàohuì wǒmen dōu fàng bùxià

After reading "The Kite Runner"

There is only one sin in this life, only one. Ant that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft.

Confusing, isn't it?

When you kill a man, you steal a life. You steal his wife'e husband, rob his children of a father. When you tell a lie, you steal someone's right to the truth.
When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness.

Do you understand now? If still not, try to think about it.

internet priavacy is dead, isn't it?

It is a much-missed wonder of how just 10 years ago, life used to have much more privacy. We basically check our e-mail, open some websites of interest, and that's it. No social networking sites, no instant messenger, no Wikipedia.

Because now with practically (almost) everybody whom we know either have a Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, Plurk, or LinkedIn account (or all of them), privacy on the internet is a nonexistent thing.

On this regard, I specifically refer to Facebook. No matter how much seclusion you impose on your privacy settings, there is always a loophole that sooner or later can fall into malefic hands.

You may think that your recent picture of you and your friends, being intimate by the shores of Malibu as totally harmless. Well, wait until one day you apply for a job at Microsoft or run as a mayor (who knows?). Potential employers do trawl the virtual world for such tripes, and the matter of how much information you disclose in the internet may well be regarded as a threat, since it also means that you may also disclose company's confidential informations.

But oh well, internet privacy is dead, isn't it?

Even my blog is still alive.

Everything is Not Always What It Seems

Hmmm... Dah lama banget ngga nulis nulis. Bukan karena sibuk, tapi lagi ga tau aja mau nulis apa. Hari ini, kebetulan aku dengerin lagu di youtube, lagu indo, dan entah kenapa lagu itu buat aku sedih. Honestly, udah berhari hari, bahkan mungkin berminggu minggu, mood ku selalu ngga baik. Dan yang jadi masalah, aku ga tau kenapa mood ku selalu unhappy.

Beberapa hari yang lalu, seorang adek kelas memanggil di kotak chat.

"Lu kenapa hari ini?", tanyanya.

"Kenapa gimana? Gua kaga kenapa2 kog", jawabku dengan agak sedikit bingung.

"Muka lu bete amat tadi gua liat", balasnya.

"Hah... Masa sih?? Kaga kog. Baru bangun tidur kali.. hahhhaha", jawabku berusaha menutupi perasaanku sebenarnya.

"Oh... ya udah kalo ga papa. Kirain ada apa2", jawab si adek kelas mengakhiri percakapan kami.

Aku... Duduk diam di depan laptop. Saat itu aku sedang membuka suatu berita, entah berita apa, karena sebenarnya aku hanya melamun, memandangi tulisan tulisan yang bukan bahasa indonesia. Aku terus melamum sampe perhatian ku teralih melihat jam di sudut laptop.

"Wah... Sudah jam 8 malam, waktunya olah raga", pikirku kemudian mengambil kaos kaki di lemari dan memakai sepatu olah ragaku. Mengisi air minum di Tumbler Starbucks-ku kemudian berangkat...

Sesampainya di running track...

"Hm.. ga banyak orang hari ini, tumben ya", pikirku dalam hati. Setelah meletakkan tas berisi Tumbler ku di kursi pinggir running track, melepas jaket biru pemberian bos kakakku, aku pun mulai kegiatan olahragaku. Pertama tama, berjalan mengelilingi running track sebanyak 2 putaran, kemudian BERLARIII... Beberapa kali aku berhenti di tengah2 kegiatan berlari-ku, beristirahat, kemudian berlari lagi.

Tanpa aku sadari, 2 jampun berlalu begitu saja di running track. "Hm.. waktu berjalan cepat sekali ya", kataku pada diriku sendiri sambil melihat jam. Waktunya cooling down!!!! Aku pun berjalan santai untuk cooling down, sebelum kemabali ke asrama. Tanpa kusadari, tiba2 kepalaku menengadah ke atas, memandang langit malam itu. "Ngga ada bintang, as usual", gumamku. "Sebenernya pasti ada bintang, cuma ngga kelihatan aja, mungkin karena polusi udara di kota ini terlalu parah", kataku sambil tersenyum.

"Good friends are like Stars, you don't always see them, but you know they are always there"

Mungkin memang benar sepertin yang orang2 tulis di status FB mereka tentang seorang sahabat. Sama halnya dengan adik kelasku yang entah bagaimana, bisa tau perasaan ku sebenarnya, dimana orang lain ga melihat kepedihan hati ini. Only few people, who able to see my fake smile. Thank you, Megi!

Everything is not always what it seems. Some people hide their tears, maybe with some reason or maybe without any reasons. I came to the realization that NOT everything happens for a reason. Everything that happens has a cause, not reason. Don't you ever think, that "cause" and "reason" are two different things??? For those, who said "everything happens for a reason". Try to understand my previous sentence.

Place Yourself in the Other Person's Shoes

In all of the debate surrounding gendered language, I’d like to offer a perspective shift away from focusing on the “badness” or “goodness” inherent in words themselves.

Words hurt not because of we detect a “wrong” property in the word, but because language is an expression of how we take others to be important. We all believe we deserve some level of consideration from other people.

When we address another person, choosing words carefully can show an appreciation for their agency, their individual personhood.

If I tell someone I’d rather not be referred to in a certain way and they deliberately go against that wish, I instinctively find it offensive that the person did not regard my desire as worth her attention.

In this sense, it isn’t the property of the word, nor even the association of the word that seems to be offensive, but rather the motivation of the individual for not taking my wishes as important.

We shouldn’t overly sensitize our language just for the sake of it, but we should realize that our words are a manifestation that shows how much we care about other people.

Choose your words carefully not because of some regard for an abstract system of correctness, but because you want other people to feel that you take them worthy of your effort and consideration.

Next Ten Years

Once upon a time not long a go, I was having brunch in one of the fine coffee shop with two of my best friends that I have known for quite long times. And here we are, three young girls, all singles, and all have different characteristics talking about anything, for anything can really bring us together. In the middle of our conversation, I asked them about the future. What are we going to be in the next ten years? Will we be the same personalities that sit together right now?

In ten years from now, will Sandra be the fine writer as her goal right now? Will Xiao-Ma be the same childish, funny and adorable person no matter what she does next? More, will I be the Florensia that I always dream of?

I wonder, will ten years give us enough time to be what we want to be right now? To be someone that can wake up in the morning and feel happy about our life. Will ten years of life will changes us? If ten years really changes me, what I will be in the next ten years from now?

In the next ten years, will I be rich and success? Or I will be someone who are in deep frustration for not be rich and success? Will I be happy for my life? Or will I be crazy of my life?

You know what; I do really hope that there is some guiding book for live. So that I can know which road to take, what job to do, and more which life is the best for me. With that book, my life maybe become so predictable, which is actually quite sucks and super duper boring, but at least I don’t have to guessing in the dark for every decision that I will take.

Our future is as mysterious as the mystery of universe. If future can be so mysterious, what is the best thing for us to deal with its mystery? What mystery behind my next ten years? Well, maybe you have to wait until next ten years to get the answer. Right now, I just want to sit and finish writing my English assignment.

A Beautiful Life (story)

I am here, alone. Driving my old motorcycle, go along my town street. My meeting with Darren, my high school’s friend two hours a go was still left on my mind. He asked me why I didn’t come to his party last Saturday night. And I do not have the answer. I wanted to say that he had not invited me, but I cancelled, and just keep the answer on my mind. That fact will hurt me more than to him.

She is not the first friend of mine, who’s no longer involved me in their life. Situation changed. Yea... I know. We are no longer in high school anymore. So, situa-tion got changed. Although actually, I never thought that my world would turn up side down like this after my high school graduation. Back at that time, I always imagined that friendship would last forever. We will be friends forever, just like our promises.

However, situation got changed. My friends, now, are old enough to get driv-ing licenses. And as soon as they get it, their parents give them a new car. The newest car that even its advertisement has not yet released. At first, it was fun. They let me join them to test their car, and of course, their driving skill. That was great experience for me, remembering that my parents can only inherit me old motorcycle. But this fun just like mist in the morning. Soon, as fast as they learn to drive smoothly, they start to ride without my presence.

Fashion also leads our friendship to different ways. With my baggy trousers, old t-shirt, and don’t forget my big thick eyeglasses, I looked like an alien when I hang out with my old high school friends. They wore leather pants and cool t-shirt with low-nicotine cigarette between their lips. So fashionable. So expensive. So far from my financial ability. Hahaha. In high school, where everyone had to wear uni-forms, these differences were not very clearly appeared. I had the same self-confidence as every friend I had. Not like now, when I have to hide on my friend’s back every time we walk on the mall or any public places. I don’t want to embarrass my self, if you want to know why.

The most upsetting point happened when I had to face the fact that my parents can’t afford for my higher education. As blue-collar worker, my father expected me to find a job as soon as possible, to help him support our family financial problems. So, there I am, sitting at the back of the cashier table of Guard, mini market nearby my neighbourhood. This job, though helps me cover my little sister’s school fee, was so pathetic. Sitting from 10 a.m. to 04 p.m. every day really gave me pain in my ass! Really! So, while my friends started to go to their university to reach every dream they have, I was stuck at this point! When they read literature works, I spent most of my time reading expiration date on the label can.

I did not blame my faith. No! I faced this situation as cool as every 19 years old teenagers could. I did my job well. I gave my attention to every customer coming, including sweet smile for extra. I read in public library to sharpen my brain. I also took care of my “ancestor”; I used to call my motorcycle like that, although this “ancestor” sometimes forced me to pull it a long the road. Especially, I never blamed my parents for every thing that happens to me. They love me as much as every parent can do. It was not their fault that I couldn’t go to the university or that I only had motorcycle to ride. They supported me with love and laughter. And every time I felt disappointed with my friends, they were always there for me, giving diversion for my broken heart. It is a beautiful life.

Though, if this is a beautiful life, why I am here? Sitting on my old motorcy-cle, smoking cheap cigarette, doing nothing on the rail waiting for the train. If this is a beautiful life, why am I not moving from my spot as the train is getting closer and closer? If this is a beautiful life, why are tears rolling down my cheek when I heard the train thundering straight to my spot? Why don’t I fell any regret when the train runs over my body? Why there is no peace that I expect when I heard my bones bro-ken into pieces? Why? Because this is a beautiful li...


End.